Stories of Hope: An Interview with Shawn Ramey
This is part of a series featuring individuals who share their life experiences with mental health issues. Recently, I asked Army veteran Shawn Ramey about his journey and his current activities. Here’s our interview:
DS: Tell us about when you first started becoming aware of concerns related to your mental health. How did these issues continue to affect you you before you sought treatment?
SR: I was diagnosed with PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) and mild alcohol abuse in the spring of 2011 spurring from my time in war as an infantryman in Afghanistan and Iraq. I was medically retired from the Army in 2009 and had known that I was affected by the things I have seen from my 2006 deployment.
Before I sought treatment, I was drinking heavily every night of the week, just to help me sleep. I felt as though I was shutting myself down from all my friends and my family. I barely spoke to most of them about the things I had seen. Putting myself in isolation like this, and drinking the way that I was, I knew that I needed to talk to someone.
DS: What was the turning point that led you to decide to seek help?
SR: My fiancé and I were watching a documentary called Restrepo; it was about a unit in Afghanistan and all the hardships they had gone through. This is the unit my company replaced when we went to Afghanistan in 2006. I knew some of the guys from the documentary from when we did the changeover with them in 2006. Seeing their interviews about what they went through and who they lost, and how their demeanors changed allowed me to look at myself more.
Going through the issues that I was going through during that time frame, and what the future had in store for me, I needed help. I set up an appointment with the local VA (veterans) clinic to begin the process. My fiancé, who later that year became my wife, was very supportive of my decision to seek help.
With how isolated I was, and how much drinking I was doing, I didn’t want to push her further away as well since she was the only constant I had at the time. Now we have three kids total (we both had one from previous marriages, and one together) and they all keep me strong and keep me going.
DS: What has your treatment consisted of, and what have you found that has worked well (or not so well) for you?
SR: I went through cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) with the focus on prolonged exposure therapy, as well as pharmacotherapy with antidepressants. This was difficult for me when I had first started because I did not want to drudge up the memories that I had been trying so hard to forget.
My therapist had me keep a journal during treatment, writing down the nightmares I was having and the thoughts and feelings that I was having during certain types of situations, like any time I had a panic or anxiety attack. Each visit we would go over what I had written down and she would help me understand why I was feeling that way and helped me develop coping mechanisms.
With what I had learned from those four months, coupled with working out seven days a week, and giving up drinking for the most part, I had a completely new outlook on life.
DS: How are things going for you now? What have you learned that has helped you to be more positive and healthy? What struggles are you still facing?
SR: This year was very difficult for me. My mother passed away in January completely unexpectedly; this started a spiral for me, but that is not as bad as it sounds. I wanted to crawl back into a bottle in a very bad way to ease the pain that I was feeling. I shut myself out again from some of my closest friends, and there were times where I couldn’t even bring myself to talk to my wife or my kids.
I was in a terrible cycle, but I had to be strong for my sisters. They took this loss harder than I did, not that I didn’t take it hard, but they were closer with my mother then I was since I was the one who left home for military service.
I did not touch alcohol for almost 4 months. I avoided a lot of social gatherings that my friends had put together because as much as I wanted to drink after this, I couldn’t allow myself to fall, I knew once I were to have those first couple of drinks that I would lose all control of my emotions and I wouldn’t know where I would have ended up.
I believe that what I had learned through my time going through therapy helped me remain strong in this incredibly trying time. Remaining strong for my sisters and being there for them helped me out tremendously as well.
Some struggles that I still face are occasional nightmares and occasionally not wanting to sleep at all. I experience some panic attacks here and there, but nothing has been too debilitating for me. With all that, I just finished my first semester back in college after seven years, going for psychology, I am currently halfway through my bachelor’s studies and I plan to take it further after that.
My goal is to be able to help other veterans with PTSD when they are in dark places as I have been. I want my mother to be proud of who I am working to become after everything that I have been through in my life.
DS: Tell us about your involvement in mental health advocacy activities and social media.
SR: Through the use of Facebook, I try to shed as much light on PTSD as possible through articles, images, or anything that allows me to spread the word. I have had too many friends I had served with succumb to their PTSD, and it is something that I have grown tired of.
With the statistic of 22 veterans a day committing suicide, I try to bring awareness to EVERYONE that we can not continue to fail these heroes. While I may have gotten a handle on my disorder, others are not so lucky, and that is why I am pursuing the studies that I am, so I can better help other veterans when they need it.
DS: What would you like to say to encourage others who are still working on their journey of recovery?
SR: For anyone that is still on their journey to recovery, I say do not give up, there is light at the end of the tunnel, and there are those here that still care for you, that will be there for you through the course of your recovery. Times will be hard, they will get harder before they ever get easier, but you are strong and you can succeed.
About Shawn
I am 34 years old, married, father of 3. I work full time as a Nuclear Security Officer, and currently going to school full-time for psychology. I served in the US Army as an Infantryman from 2004-2009 when I was medically retired. I deployed in 2006 to Afghanistan, and again in 2007 to Iraq. In 2011 I was diagnosed with PTSD after it had controlled a huge portion of my life for a couple years. After treatment, I began spreading the word on social media that it is not bad to discuss what we had gone through, and that there are ways to overcome it. Being diagnosed with PTSD does not mean that it is the end, it is the beginning of a new chapter of life. You can connect with me via LinkedIn.
Thanks so much to Shawn for sharing his inspiring story of hope!
Would you like to share your story of hope? I plan to feature more personal accounts like this from time to time on my blog. If you are interested in sharing your story, please notify me via my contact page. Also, please subscribe to my blog and feel free to follow me on X (formerly Twitter) or Instagram, “like” my Facebook page, or connect on LinkedIn. Finally, if you enjoyed this post, please share it with a friend. Thanks!