Stories of Hope: An Interview with Stephanie Anne Allen
This is part of a series featuring individuals who share their life experiences with mental health issues. Recently, I asked mental health advocate Stephanie Anne Allen about her mental health journey and her current advocacy activities. Here’s our interview:
DS: Tell us about when you first started becoming aware of concerns related to your mental health. How did these issues continue to affect you before you sought treatment?
SA: I was first diagnosed with depression at age 14. At that time, there was a horrible stigma attached to mental illness. I didn’t want to be any part of it. I was not “crazy.” I remember growing up thinking I was bad and I felt ashamed for being depressed. But it was obvious to everyone, whether “crazy” or not, I was definitely sick. I suffered from helplessness, hopelessness, unworthiness, suicidal thoughts/attempts, and self-mutilation, among other symptoms.
A few years later, I was labeled as manic-depressive (bipolar). I would suffer racing thoughts, impulsive decisions, risky behaviors, and insomnia. That diagnosis soon became a dual diagnosis, when I was defined as a borderline personality patient. I had difficulties making and keeping friends. I was cutting and burning myself. A few years after that, I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder and then schizophrenia. I was suffering from intense delusions and hallucinations of all five senses.
Mental illness has impacted my life in many ways. I lost friends, relationships, jobs, cars, homes, and even my own freedom. But despite all the pain, all the heartache, all the adversity, I was able to beat all the given odds by finding the courage, strength, faith, and hope to overcome it all.
I have been in treatment since I was a teenager, but unfortunately treatment is not always effective with every patient. There are so many different medications out there, and so many of them wouldn’t work on me or had horrible side effects.
Today, there are a lot of new psychotherapies available that simply did not exist when I was a child. And then there’s that stigma again that causes people to feel guilt and shame for seeking treatment for an illness that is not their fault.
DS: What was the turning point that led you to decide to seek help?
SA: I have had several turning points and many downfalls in my life. But the last turning point was definitely the most life-changing. After committing a crime when I was ill, I took a look at myself and studied my thoughts and behaviors and attempted to adjust what needed to be changed.
After being incarcerated at a state hospital for 18 months, you better have gotten some insight and introspection into yourself. But I believe the turning point for everyone can be different. For some it may be almost losing your life to suicide or some other major incident that causes a person to reflect on his/her own thought processes.
DS: What has your treatment consisted of, and what have you found that has worked well for you?
SA: My own personal treatment consisted of medications and psychotherapy. Finding the right meds is surely a trial and error thing. But at age 36, I was finally stabilized. I would much rather take a pill or two a day, than suffer the pain and heartache and unrest I had when I was sick. The meds keep me stable and help me to live a better life.
DS: How are things going for you now? What challenges are you still facing? What have you learned that has helped you stay positive and healthy?
SA: Currently, I am doing great! I am working on correcting all my mistakes, and picking up all the pieces. It’s not easy, but it’s what I feel needs to be done. I have now found my purpose in life and that is to inspire as many people as possible. If my story saves just one life (and it has) then my life truly has value, purpose, and worth.
If I had not suffered…if I had not been in mental pain and agony…if I had not learned how to endure…I would not be who I am today. I have gained much compassion, empathy, understanding, and wisdom. The pain shaped me into who I am today.
I will continue taking my medications exactly as prescribed. I will seek help immediately if I feel in crisis (hopefully never again). The sooner you catch the problem, the sooner you can receive treatment, and the sooner you will feel better.
DS: You’ve been active in mental health advocacy. Tell us about your involvement in those activities.
SA: I am involved in mental health advocacy. I am a NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) Connection peer support group facilitator. I am also the author of seven books on conquering mental illness…one memoir and six self-help books:
• My Mental Madness Memoir—the provocative true journey through my struggles with mental illness
• How to Survive Depression
• How to Survive Bipolar Disorder
• How to Survive Schizophrenia
• How to Survive Anxiety
• How to Survive Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
• How to Survive PTSD (Post-traumatic Stress Disorder)
DS: What would you like to say to encourage others who are still working on their journey of recovery?
SA: My message to those working on their recovery from mental illness: Life isn’t easy, and when you have mental illness that has a huge impact on your everyday living. You may feel lost. You may feel alone. You may feel that no one cares.
But I want you to know that YOU are worth fighting for. YOU are worth getting well. YOU have value and worth and your goal in life is to find your purpose, and work diligently towards fulfilling it.
You have a reason to be alive. The hardest part is finding it. But once you do, you will be so glad you did. First you need to recover so that you work towards finding that purpose. Don’t listen to the stigma. Listen to your heart. Your heart definitely wants and needs to be well again.
Have enough self-love and faith in yourself to seek out the proper help you may need. You don’t have to go it alone. And once you get that treatment and recover, you will be so happy that you began your journey of recovery in the first place. Never give up… as YOUR LIFE awaits you.
About Stephanie
My name is Stephanie Anne Allen, and I am the author of “My Mental Madness Memoir” and the entire “How to Survive” series. I am also a NAMI Connection peer support group facilitator. I am very content, and I feel successful and that my life has purpose and worth. I am grateful for my life. But it wasn’t always this way. I came from a long journey of very difficult battles with mental illness. Also, I am all over social media with positive uplifting and inspirational posts on overcoming mental illness! You can find me on Facebook, X (formerly Twitter), Instagram, LinkedIn, Tumblr, Goodreads, Amazon, Pinterest, or on my mental health blog.
Thanks so much to Stephanie for her inspiring story of hope!
Would you like to share your story of hope? I plan to feature more personal accounts like this from time to time on my blog. If you are interested in sharing your story, please notify me via my contact page. Also, please subscribe to my blog and feel free to follow me on X (formerly Twitter), “like” my Facebook page, or connect on LinkedIn. Finally, if you enjoyed this post, please share it with a friend. Thanks!