Stories of Hope: An Interview with Marie Shanley (Mxiety)
This is part of a series featuring individuals who share their life experiences with mental health issues. Recently, I asked mental health advocate Marie Shanley, also known as Mxiety, about her journey and her current activities. Here’s our interview:
DS: Tell us about when you first started becoming aware of concerns related to your mental health. How did these issues continue to affect you before you sought treatment?
MS: I was just turning 14 and realized that I felt a kind of sadness and emptiness no one else could relate to. As a teenager, this made making friends really difficult because most didn’t know how to react when I would “get real” with them.
My family would just tell me to “get up” and stop being so dramatic or sensitive. Being that they were a part of the reason I felt this way, this made me feel worse and pushed me further into depression.
At school, I tried to see a counselor but she was overbooked always and frequently had to miss appointments to deal with someone “more urgent.” I developed an eating disorder to try to regain some semblance of control over my life which didn’t end until senior year of high school. I suffered a lot in silence because I never knew who I could turn to who wouldn’t brush me off.
DS: What was the turning point that led you to decide to seek help?
MS: I had just moved into my college dorm for my second year. I had (what I later learned was) a flashback due to an underlying, untreated post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Suddenly I thought I was at home with one of my parents screaming in my face, telling me how worthless I was.
My boyfriend at the time found me curled up in a ball, crying and insisted I go and talk to someone. He walked me to the counseling center there to make an appointment, which I only did after I was 100% sure that my parents wouldn’t find out about how I was feeling.
DS: What has your treatment consisted of, and what have you found that has worked well for you?
MS: I went through cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and then talk therapy. Both did wonders for me and really turned my life around. I have been on and off medication, with my last attempt to come off of them being in 2017. Medication saved my life and gave me motivation to start creating something to help other people. I still see my therapist but now about once every other month.
DS: How are things going for you now? What challenges are you still facing? What have you learned that has helped you stay positive and healthy?
MS: As I write this, I am doing well and feel positive about the future. I still hate my low days and tend to get very upset with myself for not feeling well again, as though it’s possible to lose progress, which I know just isn’t true. I am working always on being kinder to myself and giving myself credit when it’s due. Working on finding the balance between pushing myself to be better, without trying to be the very best at everything I do.
To stay positive and healthy, I have learned that I need a purpose to keep going, and in my writing and live streaming, I have definitely found that for myself. I also know that I don’t need to keep people in my life just because they are family. That finding family who love you without sharing bloodlines feels just as incredibly fulfilling.
DS: You’ve been active in mental health advocacy and social media. Tell us about your involvement in those activities.
MS: I host a live talk show 3 times a week where I talk to professionals in the mental health field or those living with mental health concerns who are open to sharing their stories. Viewers are able to ask questions in real time and share their experiences too.
When I am not doing that I write to share my own story with a researched twist—meaning I add in resources and researched details overlaying my own journey. I also frequent as a co-host on SPSMchat (suicide prevention social media) and share my story through public speaking engagements.
DS: What would you like to say to encourage others who are still working on their journey of recovery?
MS: Not everything you do in life will be worth the time, effort and money you put into it. However, bettering yourself through therapy, recreation, learning and self-care always pays off because it makes you a better, more fulfilled, you.
About Marie
Marie is better known as Mxiety. She hosts mental health-related live discussions and interviews, as well as writes to help defeat the stigma. You can learn more about her and access other resources at her website. She offers encouragement through her X (formerly Twitter) and you can catch her live on Mixer to ask her questions directly.
Thanks so much to Mxiety for sharing her inspiring story of hope!
Would you like to share your story of hope? I plan to feature more personal accounts like this from time to time on my blog. If you are interested in sharing your story, please notify me via my contact page. Also, please subscribe to my blog and feel free to follow me on X (formerly Twitter) or Instagram, “like” my Facebook page, or connect on LinkedIn. Finally, if you enjoyed this post, please share it with a friend. Thanks!